Lawful Evil

So recently, I was hanging out  in Southern New Jersey (as I am sometimes known to do,) when my friend got a random invite from one of our old college friends to come see his band play in Philly. This was shocking news to us, (mostly because we did not realize that he had a band, but also) because he could only describe the music as Nerdcore Rap. As you can probably guess, at the mere mention of the word Nerd, this very quickly became a show I had to see. (Also Philly is a great place to satiate my unending craving for meat and cheese sandwiched together on a roll.)

That was how myself and my two friends found ourselves in a bar on South Street called The Legendary Dobbs with four dollar Miller Lites in hand and being crowded by a group of neo-punks who seemed to have a more than a small liking for Bad Religion. Soon enough though the show began and first to stage was the band we had come to see, Lawful Evil, featuring the vocal talents of 50 GP, DJ KB, KingCrit, and Click Clack Kaboom.

Now, we did not fully know what to expect. I had a feeling that being a nerd through and through, I was going to enjoy myself regardless of the quality of the music. However, I am glad to report that Lawful Evil in their debut performance did not fail to disappoint either my musical or nerdy sense of taste. Their sound was reminiscent of MC Chris (Have fun on the Robot Reservations suckers! Were not gonna honor those bogus treaties!), their beats were catchy, and most importantly their lyrics were clever. You can't hate a band that so enthusiastically raps about being super-villains, playing D&D, or loving everything that was ever good that came out of Japan. More to the point, you can't hate a band with the passion to combine a love of all things nerdy with hardcore rap. It is a combo that seems almost so contradictory that it has to work, (like vodka and Red Bull.)

Though Lawful Evil has only had one show and is still to release any albums, I predict that if they continue to keep up their hard work and the quality of sound and lyricism that I witnessed last week in a crowded Philly bar, they will find success, at least in the nerd world (which usually means playing at comic cons around the country, and having a couple thousand Facebook stalkers.) Overall, the show was a lot of fun and crackled with the energy of a band who was enjoying themselves as much as their audience was. Lawful Evil is definately worth checking out, and a band we should all keep a close Beholders-like watch over in the coming future.

*Warning lyrics can be explicit

You can check Lawful Evil out at:

ReverbNation: http://www.reverbnation.com/#!/lawfulevil

Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/#!/pages/Lawful-Evil/145075055563024?sk=info

Groundhog Day after Tomorrow

Tomorrow we are looking at a 60% chance of nuclear fallout,
but does the weekend look brighter? Jim will have the
7-Day Forecast for you  up next.

Lately I have become convinced that the world is actually coming to end. It's not so much that I believe in the Mayan calendar or even because the seventh seal of the biblical apocalypse was broken when the Giants beat the Patriots in the Superbowl. (And God pointed his mighty foam finger and from it came a cone of fire and in that fire I beheld a giant whose head did not fit-eth into his helmet of war. Hence, this soft-headed giant did make war with a nation of patriots and thus was that nation embarrassed when their captain was called for intentional grounding in their own end zone. So the seventh seal lay broken and the Lord proclaimed, in a raucous and mighty voice, "Tebow would not have made that mistake?" [Revelations 2:5-7]) What really has been freaking me out lately about the coming end times is, the weather.

As I write this it is currently 50 degree Fahrenheit outside (that's about 10 degree Celsius for my foreign friends,) and it's February. For the New York metropolitan area the average temperature in January was 35.1 degree Fahrenheit, which is four degrees above the average for the past thirty years for January. Some days have even topped out at 60 degrees. Add to this a freak snow storm in October that dumped almost 19 inches in some places, a previous summer filled with hurricanes, earthquakes, and flooding, and we very well could be looking at the beginning of Armageddon. Soon enough the icecaps will melt, sea waters will rise, and our streets will fall prey to wild gangs of roving furry creatures. Moose, mountain lions, and Robin Williams will start invading our towns as their natural habitats are slowly consumed by flood water and disaster films. You think it is a joke now, but wait till you wake up one day and find a polar bear in your kitchen drinking your Coca Cola, (and that stuff is like crack to them.)

Probably what's most disappointing about the coming weather-related apocalypse is that it will be boring. I mean we always knew the world was going to have to end, but seriously weather? I was really hoping for a good old fashioned World War III or some kind of asteroid, but no. Instead, we get to be killed off by errant jet streams and warm fronts. Having your planet destroyed by weather is like getting killed by a papercut from a Robert Frost poem. There are so many cooler ways to go, demon hordes, super-viruses, solar flares, black holes, and of course the ever-popular zombie apocalypse.

However, (as I know many of you do) I have a dream scenario for the end of our world, extraterrestrial invasion. I am not even sure why that has always appealed to me, but maybe it is the thought of the human race coming together as one people to repel foreign invaders from the stars. (Also, I may or may not receive superpowers in this scenario, but that's a discussion for another day.) The best thing about an alien invasion is that in all my research I have yet to see the human race lose to the outer space invaders. With people like Jeff Goldblum, Will Smith, and Mel Gibson on our side how could we not. All we have to do is decipher the invader's incomprehensible computer code language (because how hard could that be) to implant a virus in their mothership, throw a few glasses of water on them, and then hit them with a baseball bat, and voila... Good-bye space invaders. True, our cities and civilizations will be destroyed and lay in ruin, but as a bonus once we defeat our temporary alien overlords we will have complete access to their technology and a firmer belief in the human spirit. We could rebuild our civilizations and make them stronger and more technologically advanced. Eventually, we too would be able to stretch our reach out to the stars united as a race of people with one goal in mind, conquering planetary civilaztions weaker than ours (How could we lose).

There is no way this winter is ever going to end, as long

 as this groundhog keeps seeing his shadow. I don't

see any other way out. He's got to be stopped. And I

have to stop him. -Bill Murry

Unfortunately, those are just pipe dreams, because how do you really combat the weather? We can't shoot guns at it, it doesn't respond to our witty one-liners, and going to a nuclear solution just seems silly. I mean if Al Gore had told us that demonic hordes or man-bear-pigs would soon be rising from the underworld to take over the planet, maybe I could have found more reasons to care. After all, at least that promises the excitement of possibly getting to unload a firearm or two at a potential menace.

Yet, for those of us that believe death by weather is too boring, I offer a single strand of hope, and it all stems from one little groundhog. You see Punxsutawney Phil predicted six more weeks of winter last week, and through research I have come to find that old Punxy has an accuracy rating of 80% and is over 120 years old. Phil is also constantly surrounded by a troupe of top-hatted men called the inner-circle, and speaks Ground-hoggese, which only the president of that circle understands. This has led to my newest theory that Phil is not predicting the weather, but controlling he weather. They say the devil can take many forms, but who would actually suspect the groundhog? And if you don't believe in Phil's power don't forget what he did to Bill Murray.

I know satanic groundhogs sounds like a crackpot theory, but let's not forget that everyone said the same thing to Al Gore about Global Warming. If my theory proves true, and Punxsutawney Phil is the Anti-Christ than I predict six more weeks of winter, followed by snow in June, hellfire-rain in October, and the Sun should be the color of sackcloth and the moon the color of blood, by December.

Reviews No One Will Read: Level Up

Above Dante, Lyle, and Wyatt reacting to the news
that WoW is going Free-to-Play

If you have read anything else on this blog you know that I am a nerd and a gamer. Yet, despite those self-proclaimed labels I still found myself hesitant to check out Cartoon Network's live-action movie/series Level Up. To be perfectly clear, I am very much a fan and frequent watcher of both Cartoon Network and its after hours' programing Adult Swim. It has always amazed me that people believe that just because you become an adult you should stop watching cartoons, because quite frankly watching cartoons as an adult (and actually getting all the jokes being referenced) brings the experience to a whole new level.

I am digressing... The set-up of Level Up is almost exactly what you would expect it to be. It is about three teenage gamers who play an MMORPG called Conqueror of All Worlds. Wyatt (Gaelan Connell), Dante (Connor del Rio) and Lyle (Jessie T. Usher) spend their nights playing the game as their avatars, Black Death, Sir Bickle, and Wizza (respectively,) while unbeknownst to the trio a malfunction in the game allows them to create a hole from the game world to the real world. All of this eventually climaxes into the escape of the game's main villain, Maldark. Our young heroes are then forced to bring their skills and in-game weapons to bear IRL (in real life) against the game's enemies (and other assorted Internet related humor) as these threats leak into their quiet town of Daventry Hills.

Now, Cartoon Network has tried the live-action genre before and come tantalizingly close to success, but not really. Add to this mix that the concept of video-game-to-real-life has been around since Disney put a neon bike helmet on Jeff Bridges, and maybe you can understand why I put off checking out Level Up. Eventually though (as it so often does) my curiosity out-weighed my hesitance, and so (with low expectations) I finally checked out this newest attempt by Cartoon Network to bridge the gap of cartoon and reality, and I am glad I did. 

As I stated before, the plot and story progression is fairly predictable, but if we did away with all movies and TV shows that had predictable plot lines than we'd probably be left with... well not much. (I mean even Inception was stolen from a Donald Duck comic.) Yet, what this show lacks in originality it more than makes up for in pure fun. Level Up really shines in its tongue-in-cheek humor, especially if you are a gamer. The show prominently features MMO humor, used both casually; such as when Dante refers to the group's fourth and unofficial member (and non-gamer) Angie (Aimee Carrero) as an NPC, and overtly; such as when after vanquishing their first real-life monster, Dante attempts to loot the creature and comes back with a few gold coins and an old leather glove.

Three things every show needs: weapons, nerds,
and a cute yet attainable-looking girl.

A lot this appeal comes from the fact that Level Up makes sure never to take itself too seriously. After all,  it is a show about teenagers battling computer generated monsters, while their small town remains almost heavenly oblivious. The flippant and sometimes facetious humor extends also to the gaming world, where even the fictional MMO Conqueror of All Worlds, is really nothing more than a parody of actual MMO's. The game (which you can also play for free on CartoonNetwork.com) uses absurd weapons which include a giant orange and yellow nerf-gun called a Blast-a-Ton, a blue and orange baseball bat called Skull Cracker, and other items such as a shield that looks like a man-hole cover, and a giant metallic fist weapon called the Fist of Schoolage. Other absurdities include enemies such as Holiday Orcs, or Black Death's personal (and annoying Monty Python-esque) Bard.

Lastly, though some of the characters at times can be two-dimensional, I appreciate the nod the movie and its subsequent show gives to the gaming and nerd community in general. Each of our three heroes are different types of nerds. Wyatt is the most typical nerd who will openly talk about his love of video games, card games, quiz bowl trivia, etc, and  is always picked on, and often times beaten up because of it. Dante is a skateboarder and a rebel. He is not academically gifted, and he spends most of his time trying to get others to notice him, which often leads him into conflict with his strict mother. Lyle is the closet-nerd. He is the high school quarterback, the most popular kid in school, his father is mayor, and he actually has a girlfriend. Lyle, however, is forced to hide who he truly is in order to fit into the rigid social structure of high school. All of this is a welcome change on the perspective of gamers and nerds the media has so often given us. Whereas in the past, nerds have been portrayed as a homogenized glasses-wearing race of awkward beings, such as those in Revenge of the Nerds, or more recently the Big Bang Theory, (but don't get me wrong I love the BBT,) here we see that gamers can be as diverse as anyone else. It is a welcome change of perception and I hope the show does not attempt to minimize these distinctions as it goes forward in the coming months and years. One of the reasons for this new look at gamers and nerds may be because the production companies of Cartoon Network Studios and Alive & Kicking Productions brought in my favorite team of Internet aficionados, Rooster Teeth as consultants on the movie.

Detractors will no doubt say that the show lacks depth and only finds its humor in pop culture and video game references, but to those critics I could only say, "lighten up." Its a movie/show aimed at young adults and when all is said and done it fullfills its main goal. Level Up is both humorous and entertaining. Not everything on TV needs to be Shakespeare or Battlestar Galacitca. (Besides most of what I write lacks depth and is pop-culture related too). Yet, with witty dialogue, gamer-related humor, and okay CGI (I mean for a cable network television show marketed to younger viewers), Level Up has the potential to finally be the live-action success that Cartoon Network has been hoping for. I will certainly continue to watch, and I recommend that you do too.

"Level Up" is presented with a knowing sense of pop culture pitched beyond just prepubescent kids. - Variety

There is an underlying theme of the importance of friendship and loyalty and teamwork, and the true heroism and bravery that all gamers carry in their souls. -SciFi Mafia

Geek Style

So I have been busy the past few weeks moving into a new apartment. I have learned a few things during this process: One, I learned that when the cable guy says he'll be there between 2 and 4 pm, don't expect him till 6 pm; and Two, you should always measure your doorways before buying a couch. However, now that a lot of the heavy lifting has been taken care of I have turned my attention to decoration. I suppose I could always just throw some movie posters on the wall and call it a night, but where's the fun in that?

I have always preferred a more subtle approached to my geekdom, which is why I was so thrilled to find so many artistic options to display my love of video games, comics, and movies. Also, (being an artist at heart) I have decided to add a few of my own pieces to what will be my home gallery of geek art. Below I have listed some of my favorite options, as well as where you can view and purchase them. I hope you enjoy.


My favorite piece by an artist named
Danny Haas, he has more than just Superman.
Check out his work and buy some prints
at Society6 Art.

I love the old time look of posters like this.
This particular one comes in a pack with four
other BSG themed posters and can be found
at ThinkGeek.com.



This poster comes in a pack called the
Blue Sun Travel Series and it displays
locales found through the Firefly 'Verse.'
It can also be found at ThinkGeek.com.

Pretty self-explanatory, but I like how it
mimics the old British wartime posters.
I picked it up on Amazon.com.

 







For the minamalists out there I found this great
painting by artist Greg Guillemin. He also has
some great Iron Man and Batman prints at
his page at Society6 Art.

Here is a great one of classic Nintendo character, Bomberman
looking more bad a$$ than ever. You can find it along
with similar others at the Geek Art Store.

 



 



This next one is art to the evolutionist
and gamer alike. This print along with
others can be bought at the
Pop Chart Lab.

Here is a great classical representation of everyone's favorite
pointy-eared icon (not Spock), Link, from Legend of Zelda.
It is by Jude Buffem and can be purchased at Jude' site.

A great take on an old classic that harkens
back to the dark days of the 90's. This print is
Jorsh Pena and can be found on Society6 Art.

This last one is an Adam J. Brunner original. It was inspired
by art I looked at while I was shopping in IKEA. Instead
of showing some kind of boring city I decide to go with a
place we would all much rather visit.

For more great geek art ideas I recomend that you browse Society6 Art; ThinkGeek.com; or check out Geek-Art.net. Because why just put anything on your walls when you can be putting up pure awesomeness.

Blame ©anada

Online Piracy

I was outraged yesterday by my inability to access Wikipedia©, but my anger was not directed at the Wikimedia Foundation©. Instead it was directed at the United States Senate© and House of Representatives©, (as it so often seems to be these days). This is mostly due to their proposals of the PIPA and SOPA bills currently being discussed in Congress©. Both PIPA (Protect Intellectual Properties Act) and SOPA (Stop Online Piracy Act) are directed at limiting what the government believes is the Internet's continual violation of intellectual property.

To boil it down the bill opens the door for the Government to shut down access to any website which copyright infringed material is illegally displayed or uploaded to sites, and in case you were just recently transported to 2012 from 1985, that basically means 99.99% of the Internet. It also allows for criminal prosecution of violators, and I am not just talking about going after just the individual posters. The government and companies could go after the sites (like YouTube and BuzzFeed) that the materials are posted on. It would effectively begin an Internet-wide system of censorship, but I know what you will say. "The material has been copyrighted and by using it, websites and users are stealing money from the poor artists and companies that need those royalty payments to feed their starving Porsche's." To which I respond, "Get back in your DeLorean© and go back to the 80's," because what legislators don't get is how broadly this law can be applied.

As a writer I am well aware of the need for copyright laws and protection against intellectual theft. There is nothing more devastating to an artist than to have his or her creation stolen and sold off cheaply like how (I assume) my kidney was after that time I woke up in a bath of ice in that garage in Mexico. Yet, there is a difference between intellectual theft and freedom of speech. Take for example my blog, Meta-Humanity©. If SOPA and PIPA were to pass, I would be completely fracked©. Every other line I write is littered with cultural references from movies, TV, books, etc. The problem is that, I write this blog along the lines of my personality and if I make pictures or write references to copyrighted material it is not with the intent of stealing revenue or committing intellectual theft, instead I use it as a common frame of reference. If anything I create homages to popular culture for comedic purposes. Yet, under the new law someone like me could even face prosecution, (and I'm not built for jail, I'm too pretty).

I have not disagreed with a piece of legislation so much since Congress introduced their 2006 Superhuman Registration Act©, and I am not the only one. Wikipedia© went dark for the entire day on January 18th with the tagline "Imagine a world without free knowledge," with other sites such as Reddit© following Wikpedia©'s lead. Google© blacked out their logo in protest, and even Craig's List© put a message of protest that could be seen before you could access their site. You know it must be serious when a website dedicated to selling old lawn chairs and trying to connect a random person with that cute guy who was wearing a red hat on the train today, stands up and takes notice. Other opponents of these bills are some lesser and more obscure companies with names such as: Yahoo©, YouTube©, Facebook©, Twitter©, AOL©, Linkedln©, eBay©, and Mozilla©.

Stop Online Piracy and Protect Those Who Cannot
Protect Themselves, Corporations. 

However, in all fairness these bills came about because Canadian Pharmacies were trying to use Google© to illegally import prescription drugs into America, so I can understand why the government is acting the way it is, but this is like throwing the baby, the cat, and the fine china out with the bath water. These laws have the potential to be taken to the extreme. Its worrisome mostly because the Internet is currently a place where the free exchange of ideas and porn creates a community of people who can rapidly communicate and anonymously curse at one another. So in much the same way as any verbal (non-Internet) communication might frequently use references to pop culture, shared ideas and experiences, etc, so does the Internet. That's part of what culture is, a set of agreed upon common references that link a society to one another. Imagine if the government tried enacting a law that meant we couldn't talk about anything that fell under copyright laws. That may seem an far out example, but censoring the Internet in this way is tantamount to a violation of the First Amendment, because really if they can sensor the use of intellectual properties like this, where does it stop? Political dissent? Religious beliefs? Celebrity gossip?

The problem here, (and has always been,) is that the Government really does not know what to make of the Internet. On one side it can be a source of entertainment much like movies or TV, but it can also be a source of revenue or purchasing, like a business. On another side it can be a source of information and news like newspapers or encyclopedias, and on yet another it is also a community of people who discuss topics and express opinions. Congress has to realize that the Internet cannot be treated like a single entity, because when you make broad and vague laws that apply to the web's business side, those laws also have the potential to touch and impact all those other aspects of the Internet.

The whole problem is made worse by the fact that, ultimately, limiting and policing the web never seems to work. The real pirates and criminals often slip away into the vastness that is the World Wide Web leaving only the innocent or well-meaning among us to share the full brunt of unjust laws. Besides we should really be looking to be lay blame where blame is due, and in my opinion we have been sorely in need of regulations on Canada for a long time now.

Travel Plans

"You excited?" asked Marc in front of me.

"Huh?" I replied articulately. My attention was rapt on a pudgy fingered woman who was scolding her child for crying. The boy could not have been any older than five or six years, and his mother's anger was only making him cry even louder.

"Are you excited about the trip?" asked Marc again as if he were the one talking to a six year old.

I brought my attention back to where I was and with it returned the sickening feeling I had been having all morning. "Yeah, it'll be fun," I said with less enthusiasm than he was expecting.

"Fun?" he looked at me as if I was from a different planet. "Craig, we're going to Australia. This is going to be more than fun. I promise its going to be the trip of your lifetime. You're going to love it. I know this great little spot on Bells Beach where the surf and the women are perfect."

"It sounds fun." I tried to muster up more excitement for the idea but I couldn't quite get it past the lump that was forming in my throat.

"Trip of your lifetime." Marc turned back to peer toward the front of the line. "I hate these security checks. What exactly do they think they're going to find?" he muttered under his breath.

I was absentmindedly running the thin starched belt-like rope through the fingers of my left hand. It ran from one black pole to another being held together by nothing but small clasps. It separated the lines of people as they waited their turn to pass through the security check up ahead. It was such a small and flimsy obstacle, like the kind of thing you would see at a bank while you were waiting for the next teller. I could walk right over it and it would only prove to be a minor inconvenience. There was nothing holding me there, in that line, or in that place. I could just walk out and never look back.

"You okay, bud?" said Marc. His face was suddenly close to mine. "You're looking a little pale."

"I'm fine," I lied.

We took another step forward with the line. Like a giant caterpillar the throng of people were slowly progressing forward and I could hear the minimum wage TSA agent speaking to a person not more than fifteen people in front of me.

"Step forward and raise your hands," said the officer in a monotone voice as she waved a wand over the tall business man. "Are you carrying any firearms, restricted food, wood products or exotic metals with you today, sir?" 

"We've been friends since the third grade, Craig," said Marc drowning out the security officer. "I know when your lying. You're nervous about the trip aren't you?"

"Its not the trip itself," I admitted, "it's getting there." My left hand was gripped around the snap that held together the belt-like barrier. As I talked I played with it, hooking and unhooking the simple plastic clasping mechanism.

"You're worrying over nothing. You're going to be perfectly fine."

"Maybe we should have flown." I looked ahead to the slow moving line, and wished it would move slower. We were now ten people from the front.

"Flown?" ejaculated Marc with a laugh, "and spend 25 hours couped up in a tin-can. No thank you."

"I just mean how safe is it really?"

"Your starting to sound like one of those nuts you see on the news."

"No," I quickly said, "I'm just a little nervous. I've never used a TTP before. I don't know how comfortable I am with the idea of having my body atomized and transported to the other side of the world."

"According to the statistics driving a car is more dangerous than trans-teleportation."

"I heard that its not really you that comes out on the other side. They say that the machine really disintegrates the real you, copies all your information, and then uses it to create an exact replica of you at the other end of the machine."

"If its an exact replica, doesn't that mean its still you?" said Marc like I was crazy.

"What if its not?" I looked ahead again, there were four people ahead of us. "What if it's just some person with all your memories and your personality, but its not you. I'm me, what if the person you meet on the other side is me, but not me."

"Philosophy was never my best class," said Marc. "Besides, I use the TTP all the time when I travel for work. I'm still me," he said with a laugh.

"How can you be sure?"

Marc was silent for a moment as if considering my thought and for a minute I thought I had got him. Instead he just broke into a wide grin and clapped me on the back in the way that he always did when he was dismissing my ideas. "Its going to be fine, Craig. Trust me."

I hated when he dismissed my ideas with his usual grin and slap on the back, like I was a child who needed comforting. Worst yet, he knew it annoyed me, but it also reminded me that it was my friend standing there in front of me. I never questioned that. He was Marc, right down to his idiosyncrasies. He was every bit the abrasive, loud, and sometimes dense man I had always known. He tapped his foot when he was nervous and showed off his big lop-sided smile to any woman who passed.

Maybe he was right, I told myself. I was just being ridiculous. The government never would have approved TTP travel if it wasn't safe.

"Step forward," said the squat mannish woman dressed in the blue TSA uniform. Marc put his bags on the machine and did as he was instructed. "Raise your arms. Are you carrying any firearms, restricted food, wood products, or exotic metals with you today, sir?"

"No, ma'am." Marc gave the woman his biggest grin yet.

She never noticed as she finished waving the wand over his body. "Clear," said the officer as Marc moved forward. She turned to me. "Step forward."

By the time I got my bags and joined the line for the trans-teleportation booths I was calmer. I knew I was just over-analyzing. I always over-analyzed everything. Millions of people used the TTP a day. None of them ever came out different. None of them ever talked about dying in the machine. At most people said it was nothing more than a tickling sensation.

I held onto that reassuring thought as we made our way through the terminals and got in line for the NY to SYD TTP booth. I did some deep breathing and by the time I stepped onto the glossy metallic floor I was feeling much better about everything. After all people had the same doubts about the airplane, the automobile, and the train when they were first put into use. In fact, I wouldn't be surprised to hear that people even had the same kind of doubts about the horse-drawn carriage.

My calm shattered like glass once the heavy plastic doors closed around us. They locked with a final and deafening click. I realized that I didn't even want to go to Australia. It had all been Marc's idea. I was more than happy to sit at home. I was seized by the sudden urge to jump at the doors and throw my body against them until they crashed open, but I knew I did not have the strength.

They looked like thin plastic but they were reinforced and coated with a special polymer that made them as hard as steel and able to withstand the force of the trans-teleportation field. There were stories of people so desperate to get out of TTP Booths they broke several bones in their body in the attempt. They were of course promptly arrested afterwards for trying to damage government property.

I looked around at the dozen or so others standing in the booth with me. None of them were panicked or even seemed the slightest bit distressed. Most were chatting lightly or looking around with a disinterested glaze in their eyes. Marc saw me looking and mouthed the word, "relax," which he followed promptly with a lop-sided grin, though it could have been directed at the pair of college girls behind me.

"Please stand still," said a calming female voice. "Bioscans in process."

Almost as one everyone in the booth stopped chatting or moving and stood stock still as the attendant had showed us in the instructional video. With my left hand, I clung to the slick plastic handle of my luggage as if it was a life raft. The grip was digging into my palm but I barely noticed as the bluish light of the bioscan passed over me. I felt a sort of tickling sensation.

"Bioscan complete," said the automated voice again. "Transport initiated. Have a safe trip."

My nerves were suddenly on fire and the world went white...

"See," said Marc as we stepped out of the the retrieval booth in Kingsford Smith Terminal, " and it didn't even hurt."

"I kind of tickled," I said, the tension of the trip finally leaving me. "I guess you were right."

"Of course," he said laughing. "C'mon I know this great little place down in the harbor to get some lunch. I'm starving."

"Right behind you," I said as I grabbed my bags in my right hand. The stress of the trip was quickly being replaced by the excitement and euphoria of being halfway around the world. My worries suddenly seeming childish.

Advancing Levels

I called up my friend the other day and the first thing out his mouth was to tell me that he had crafted a  Green Steel item in DDO (Dungeons and Dragons Online.) For anyone not in the know with MMO (Massive-Multiplayer Online) games, crafting is usually a skill that allows for the creation of items or upgrades, such as weapons, clothing, armor, etc. It allows the player to feel productive and creative within the virtual environment, and to establish alternate goals to a game that is based mostly on killing things, but what struck me was that my friend was so proud of the item he crafted that he talked like an eager parent. One would have thought he was able to reach into the game and wield the created staff himself. Subsequently, I found out that crafting this item took many man-hours of farming materials, raiding dungeons, and combining several different processes. When all was said and done he estimated it as a 2.5 month process that culminated in the creation of a digital collection of pixels and code.

Maybe you find that absurd, but I don't. However, it did get me thinking about how the happiness one gets from a video game stacks up next to real-world experiences. I mean happiness does not necessarily have to be linked to physical things, and video game achievements have been astounding players since Link opened his first treasure chest. Some will probably argue that it's fantasy and has no impact on real day-to-day life, but so is the feeling of euphoria one gets when their football team wins a game or from winning a hand of cards against your friends. Ultimately everything affects us through our mood and our mood colors how we see and interact with the world, whether it be the real one or a virtual one.

According to some contemporary beliefs there are different levels of happiness. On this scale what my friend experienced by completing a particularly difficult and useful in-game weapon falls into Level 2 Happiness (I think that's that's the ice-world level.) The creation and completion of his staff gave him a sense of accomplishment, pride, and furthermore a tangible and visible achievement that can be seen (and envied) by other players on DDO. Level 2 Happiness is a higher level of happiness than Level 1, which is classified as only momentary happiness. Its the feeling you get while eating an ice cream cone or riding a roller coaster. Its the kind of happiness you would get from playing Angry Birds or Tetris, a happiness quick fix. However, even this can be increased to Level 2 Happiness if you get a high score on the Pac Man leader board or on one of those Photo Hunt machines you find in some bars. You are essentially putting an accomplishment out for everyone to see and envy, (even if they won't think it is funny that you put A$$ instead of your real initials.)

Level 3 Happiness is when people start playing multi-player games with friends or strangers online. Feeling accomplished in a group setting is part of the human need and condition. We are driven to form civilizations, societies, and of course guilds. So it is only logical that contributing to a community or having pleasurable interactions with other individuals can help a person achieve an even greater level of happiness, (though it is admittedly hard to sometimes find "pleasurable" interactions with other people on the Internet.)

What all this means is that no matter the accomplishment it is possible to receive real and tangible happiness from a virtual world. In fact, the psychologist, Martin Seligman, gives another requirements for happiness as PERMA (pleasure, engagement, relationships, meaning, and accomplishments.) Video games fulfill all five criteria. They offer not only pleasure and engagement, but also the potential for the creation of relationships, both real and imagined. Video games even have one advantage over real-life, they give the player meaning. They are goal oriented and accomplishment-based. Even the old Mario and Zelda games were about battling to save a princess. Nowadays, whether you play as Solid Snake, Nathan Drake, or Cloud from Final Fantasy you have goals, desires, and ambitions within that virtual world. You adapt the character's motivations and add motivations of your own, such as assembling the coolest weapon you can, just like my friend did. Accomplishment is a big part of happiness and it is something video games offer in spades. In fact, most games even have Easter Eggs (hidden goals and secrets which can be discovered) and systems for achievement. Xbox is famous for its achievement system which has almost becomes a game in itself. I mean how else are people going to figure out that you could kill an opponent in Modern Warfare by dropping a supply crate on their head?

Now, let me just clarify. All I am saying is that people tend to not give video games enough credit. All too often society treats the gaming community in the same way the literary community treats comic book readers. I am not advocating giving up your real-life to spend it entirely as a well-rendered avatar in a virtual world, no more than I would advocate giving up your job to volunteer full-time at the homeless shelter. Eventually too much of anything (good or bad) often forces paradigms to implode upon themselves like a neutron star. After all, Level 4 Happiness (the ultimate happiness) is about finding balance as well as a fulfillment with yourself and the universe around you, and its hard to argue that one will ever truly find all of that in a virtual environment... Then again, its arguable that the majority of humans never reach Level 4 Happiness. I certainly have not, but you can't stop trying. So until I reach enough experience points to advance to Level 4, I will continue grinding and strive to find my contentment in both the real and virtual worlds.