Seeing as that most high schools will be graduating in a few weeks, I thought it was time to let the fictional students out there know what their fictional options are for continuing on with their education. After all, if you're going to spend four years to get a piece of paper, what's the difference if it comes from Harvard or one of the finest pulp institutions? At least it will be cheaper...
Honorable Mentions: Gotham City University, Hillman College, Springfield University, Adams College, Metropolis University, Unseen University, Faber College, Coolidge College, Harrison University, University of Los Angeles, California University, and South Central Lousiana State University.
Superb academics in areas such as science, world language, robots, and monkey physics, College University has something for every student, man or primate... also aliens. Students will especially enjoy the dorm experience set in wide and luxurious 2D flash animation. Socially, College University offers students numerous recreational spaces and activities, including: a student lounge, numerous concerts by famous bands, like Old Australian Robots (O.A.R.), and the college is set in close proximity to fine eating establishments such as Kung-Fu Karl's. CU is also set close to a popular ski slope, though the college officially denies all connection with any disappearance by students and further claims that they never met anyone named Big Jim, and certainly never saw anyone named Big Jim get mauled by a polar bear. So come on out to College University this weekend for an open house and meet our mascot, Punchy the Kangaroo.
Pennbrook University (Boy Meets World)
Located in sunny Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, Pennbrook is an institution of class and tradition. A liberal arts university that still maintains a small college feel, (so much so that we recruit our faculty mainly by hiring old high school teachers that follow their neighbor/students to college.) With an accomplished sports team the Pennbrook Penguins have never won a championship, but we know that with your help, this year will be the year we beat those Amish from St. Jedediah's. Pennbrook University is the kind of place where any awkward scrunchy-haired kid who somehow landed a gorgeous girlfriend, and his cooler, C- student, trailer trash friend can reach adulthood, but even if you're not that kind of person, we know Pennbrook is the place for you.
Hudson University (DC Comics, Law and Order, Castle, The Cosby Show, more...)
Hudson University is so renowned that it has touched thousands of lives across different worlds and universes. Set in the heart of Manhattan we here at Hudson pride ourselves on our relationship with our students, but not in that creepy SVU. We are often in the news, and not only for our many student and faculty disappearances and other pending civil suits, (which our lawyer says we must mention here for legal reasons.) We have a broad and well educated faculty, despite the fact that, odds are, at least one of them may turn out to be a super-villain in the next four years. Every year our graduates go on to rewarding careers in business, education, and engineering. Our Hudson Law school is one of the top law schools in New York, mostly because of all the mysterious murder/rapes that happen on campus. So if you are looking for a school where you only have a 2% chance of being killed or violated in unspeakable ways, than HU is the place for you.
Mars University (Futurama)
Remember our motto, "Knowledge Brings Fear," and at Mars University we strive to embody that knowledge. Founded in 2636 through generous donations by the Wong Family, Mars U has the largest library collection in the western universe. We have well recognizable faculty such as Professor Hubert J. Farnsworth, Dr. Ogden Wernstrom, and Ethan 'Bubblegum' Tate, our Downtown Professor of Applied Physics. With a robust Greek life students may join one of our many sororities or fraternities such as Snooty House, or Epsilon Rho Rho. Our dean can sometimes be overzealous and uptight, but what dean isn't when it comes to the shenanigans of free spirited and rebellious college hijinks? Financial aid is also available to students through room space in our financial aid dormitory. So come to Mars University and welcome to the world of your tomorrow.
State University (Venture Bros.)
At State University we cater to a wide variety of students, and we pride ourselves on our hands-off, non-judgemental, policy that allows students to discover who they are on their own. When you arrive on our campus you will be awed by the campus center, the dorm rooms and the many many laboratories we have to offer. As you may have already guessed we have a wide selection of super science majors. Yes, we don't bother with those other sissy majors like English or first aid, here at State University we know what is important: teaching young children how to perform dangerous and morally questionable science. At SU we are proud that we have graduated more super scientists and super villains than any other institution on the planet. With names such as, esteemed alumni, Professor Richard Impossible, Baron Von Underbite, and the Dr. Jonas Venture Sr., you know that you will be getting a quality education. Also we have both O.S.I. and Guild recruiters on staff to help you in choosing your career path. So remember, when it comes to selecting your college, think it through and chose SU!
University of California Sunnydale (Buffy the Vampire Slayer)
A university conveniently located in the small California town of Sunnydale, and ti was always there, even when it seems like it wasn't there for three seasons prior to its appearance. Currently, the school has been rebuilt after it was sucked into the giant sinkhole that consumed the town of Sunnydale, which locals have come to colorfully call "the Hellmouth." But like a phoenix from the ashes UCS has risen to be better than ever. We have a comprehensive studies program and a robust student body, that despite the disappearances, continues to make the University of California at Sunnydale a fun a safe-ish place to gain a higher education. The school offers hundreds of after school activities such as participation in Greek life or other student-run initiatives. Local places of interest include the campus' coffee ship, the Grotto, which has been destroyed but rebuilt several times. We will be having an open house this weekend, which will end promptly before sundown, so get here early and check us out.
Empire State University (Marvel)
Empire State University graduates go far in the world. ESU offers a variety of majors backed by world class faculty, most of which who have not yet become super-villains. We offer state of the art facilities and a truly buzzword-worthy learning experience. Situated in the heart of New York, City the most important city in the universe, you will never be at a lack for entertainment or cataclysmic danger. Our close proximity to historic venues such as Rockefeller Plaza, Central Park, and Wall Street means that students will find culture as well as fun. Keep your eyes open you may even see some of our favorite heroes rocketing or swinging through the skies, such as Reed "Mr. Fantastic" Richards, ESU's most famous graduate. So whether you are interested in cosmology, literature, genetic recombination, or one of the hundreds of other majors we offer, than ESU is the place to be.
Barnett College (Indiana Jones)
Founded in 1823, historic and beautiful Barnett College is set among the scenic views of Fairfield New York, and is among the top of Ivy League schools in the country. We here at Barnett consider ourselves academics as well as educators. Our school funds several expeditions and projects throughout the school year, including ones headed up by one of our most famous professors Dr. Henry Jones Jr. We also share close ties to the National Museum where many of the artifacts you will find there have been discovered by our students and faculty. Though our attendance and work policy for professors is fairly relaxed, we have a dedicated and knowledgeable teaching staff. Students will benefit from their years of field work and various skills. So when you are looking for a place to attend this fall, be sure to check our Barnett.
Starfleet Academy (Star Trek)
Starfleet Academy is for the best of the best. We challenge our students at every turn so that they will make the most extraordinary officers that the United Federation of Planets has ever seen. As a cadet you may look forward to taking class on advanced warp mechanics, xenobiology, 20th Century Earth culture (a requirement, as most starship crews will wind up being sent backward in time to that time period at least once or twice.) With a diverse and friendly student body you will enjoy your time in sunny San Francisco. Our classes are taught by quadrant-renowned officers and presents challenges that will test your very wits, while eating an apple. Our promise is that you will graduate, confident that you have received the very best education possible. You will even be able to come up with on-the-fly technical solutions to complicated problems, such as repairing a rupture in a trans-warp conduit with anti-matter refuse from the dillithium chamber, and explain those solutions in relatively easy to understand analogies, like plugging up a leaky faucet with chewed bubblegum. So join Starfleet and you too can boldy go with a long and fulfilling career... unless you are wearing a red shirt.
Greendale Community College (Community)
What can you expect from Greendale Community College? We say: EXPECT THE WORLD! Greendale Community College prides itself on its affordable credit hours, manageable campus size, and interesting people. Did you know actor Luis Guzman was once a student here? Founded in 1974, GCC has been a great place for students to acquire the skills they need to enter the workforce and on your budget. With over 80 areas of study, you can explore your interests before deciding on a major. Our academic and career advisors will help you create a plan you can get behind! Not interested in staying at Greendale forever? Community College makes an excellent stepping stone and transferring credits to and from Greendale has never been easier. To aid with your transition away from Greendale, we have developed the "Six Degrees of Preparation" plan to make sure you have skills in the following areas: PHYSICAL, MENTAL, PUBLIC, SWIMMING, BRAIN, and COMPUTER. Greendale is committed to helping you prepare for success. Don't forget our beautiful campus! In the middle of the day there are at least thirty great places to stay in the shade, usually under beautiful trees and awnings. With all this talk about "hedge funds" in the news, we've started our own! By summer 2010 each of our walkways will be flanked by a number of decorative hedges. Did we mention that actor Luis Guzman was once a student here? Everyone has their own strengths and weaknesses, and the beauty of Greendale is that you won't be confronted with either. We want you to feel comfortable and at home on our campus. Come to Greendale, your mind will change, but your life doesn't have to. (Excerpted from GreendaleCommnity.com)
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